Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
