dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
she told me i tasted like america
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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