too bad you live with your parents still
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize