i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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