I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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