Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
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Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
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He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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