he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
