i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
