I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
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you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
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There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt