I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
