guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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