dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
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i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
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I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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