the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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