kristin has been a bad kristin
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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