doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Swine flu. Run for my life!
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Boobs are out for the taking
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
