i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize
