How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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