is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
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last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
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So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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