I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Randomize