Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
