Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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