Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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