I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Randomize
