So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize