When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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