VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
