I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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