I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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