Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
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dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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