You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
