Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...

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(507): View more from Minnesota

Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher

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(856): View more from New Jersey

She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me

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21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(248): View more from Michigan

Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.

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(863): View more from Florida

There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.

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(314): View more from Missouri

I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?

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(505): View more from New Mexico

I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.

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(416): View more from Toronto

how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.

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