Define "chronic" masturbator.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
