Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize
