Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
