Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize