I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>