I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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