I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
