i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
