so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
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I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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