I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Help me help you realize you are a moron
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
