Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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