you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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