just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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