OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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