A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I think we might need a safe word for this...
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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