Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
