Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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