if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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