mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Randomize