Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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