Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
