marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize